Tell us a joke.

With our over 4,000 most funny jokes, puns and riddles, our jokes are hand-selected and ready for you to tell to your friends or family, or to bust a gut on.

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Mar 24, 2016 · Funny talking Tom and ben doing joke Sponsor this series: http://www.cut.com/sponsorshipCome play with us!Sign up at http://bitly.com/hihofans to get updates on HiHo, special offers, and exclusi...90 Rhyming Jokes. By Laughlore Team Updated on September 12, 2023. Rhyming jokes, with their playful wordplay and clever twists, have been a cherished form of humor for generations. These witty quips often leave us grinning and amused, as they take everyday situations and turn them into a delightful play on words.Peanut Knock Knock Jokes. Moose Knock Knock Jokes. Chocolate Knock Knock Jokes. Golf Knock Knock Jokes. Funny Bear Knock Knock Jokes. Dragon Knock Knock Jokes. Mother’s Day Knock Knock Jokes. Don’t forget to subscribe to our email list so that you know when we add more great jokes to the site that will leave you laughing for hours!Valentine's Day jokes to remind us that humor is the way to the heart. Easter jokes that are to dye for. Father's Day jokes that'll prove you inherited Dad's funny bone. Halloween jokes guaranteed ...

Ghost Poop: You feel the poop come out, but there is no poop in the toilet. Clean Poop: You poop, it’s in the toilet, but there’s nothing on the toilet paper. Second Wave Poop: You’re done pooping and you’ve pulled your pants up to your knees, but something tells you you’re not done.

May 17, 2018 · Hilarious Joke #3. A priest, a minister, and a rabbi want to see who’s best at his job. So they each go into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. Later they get together. The ...

As he sat outside the class, he could not stop laughing. The principal walks by and asks, “Frank, why are you sitting outside your classroom laughing?”. Frank replies, “I farted in class, and the teacher threw me out.”. The principal asks him again, “Well then, why are you laughing?”. Frank says, “Those idiots are sitting in the ...If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It’s always 90 degrees there. I don't recommend entering a wormhole. You might get stuck in the apple. The owner of the tuxedo store kept hovering over me when i was browsing, so I asked him to leave me alone. He said, “Fine, suit yourself.”.In the M&Ms commercials, large candies with arms and legs chat and joke around with people and celebrities. You can make your own version of one of these characters and use it as a...Honest Brand Slogans. Hallmark: “When you care enough to give a card mass-produced by a corporation.”. Ritz crackers: “Tiny, edible plates.”. CliffsNotes: “They’re still going to know ...The best dirty jokes are not for the faint of heart and are guaranteed to make even the boldest blush. Our collection of 101 dirty jokes includes raunchy one-liners and hilarious punchlines. These jokes are perfect for adults who appreciate a more risqué sense of humor. Sit back, relax, and get ready to dive into the filthiest, funniest gags ...

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Sep 5, 2023 · History of National Tell A Joke Day. The origins of National Tell A Joke Day are unclear. The holiday seemingly emerged in the 1990s or early 2000s as a lighthearted occasion to enjoy humor. While the founder is unknown, the day promotes laughter and comedy. Telling jokes has long been a way for people to bond, entertain, and lift spirits.

Valentine's Day jokes to remind us that humor is the way to the heart. Easter jokes that are to dye for. Father's Day jokes that'll prove you inherited Dad's funny bone. Halloween jokes guaranteed ...Apr 24, 2023 · 105 of the best short jokes and one-liners to get you laughing in seconds. "I'm friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know why". Master of the one-liner Tim Vine makes a few appearances ... Google: “Once upon a time, a computer crashed and landed in therapy. It had too many ‘bytes’ of emotion!”. “Hey Google, why did the tomato turn red?”. Google: “Because it saw the salad dressing!”. “Google, why did the robot …31. ADVERTISEMENT. A well-timed joke can often be the perfect pick-me-up for the brain. An amusing little nugget that tickles your mind which you can share with others in the …Tell a joke and keep it clean. Telling a joke that you might find funny could get your interview shortened very quickly if the interviewer doesn't share your sense of humour. Try to stick with jokes that would suitable for children in grade-school, or in a PG-rated movie.Aug 30, 2020 · Siri: “None. A woodchuck is just a groundhog. So it would probably predict six more weeks of winter.”. Hey Siri: Do you like Pokemon Go? Siri: “I’ve been on the hunt for a Mew. And Mewtwo”. Siri: “Of course. That’s what it’s all about. Oh, wait, that’s the hokey pokey, mon.”. Utah. An elderly Mormon visits his doctor and asks if he’ll live to be a hundred. “Do you smoke or drink?” asks the doctor. “Those things have never and will never touch my lips,” says ...

A statistics joke... Three statisticians go deer hunting with bows. They see a giant buck in the woods. Statistician #1 fires his arrow--it goes 10 yards to the left. Statistician #2 fires his arrow--it goes 10 yards to the right. Statistician #3 throws down his bow and yells, "We got it!" upvote downvote report.In this video I ask Alexa (the voice of the Amazon Echo) to TELL ME A JOKE! Over and over and over again and OH BOY is she funny!ps - I promise if have video...International Joke Day: Tell us your favourite hilarious gag. Today is the day to enjoy a good laugh as the world celebrates International Joke Day! Held every 1 July, the day is designed to start ...109 Actually Funny Clean Jokes for Any Situation. Pull out these PG jokes anytime you need a wholesome laugh. Antibiotics and insulin aside, laughter is the best medicine. However, while many of us have repertoires chock-full of raunchy jokes perfect for cracking up our college pals, there are numerous times when a more delicate, clean joke is ...Peanut Knock Knock Jokes. Moose Knock Knock Jokes. Chocolate Knock Knock Jokes. Golf Knock Knock Jokes. Funny Bear Knock Knock Jokes. Dragon Knock Knock Jokes. Mother’s Day Knock Knock Jokes. Don’t forget to subscribe to our email list so that you know when we add more great jokes to the site that will leave you laughing for hours!1. Just got attacked by 6 dwarves. Not Happy. 2. A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank. The rabbit says, “I believe that I am a type o.”. 3. You know, there’s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot. 4.

Hilarious jokes provide boundless laughter and endless amusement. Whether you’re in need of a quick mood lifter or a hearty chuckle, hilariously funny jokes will tickle your funny bone and leave you grinning from ear to ear. Also, the benefits of laughter extend beyond mere amusement. Scientifically proven to reduce stress, boost mood, and ...Funny as it may seem, there are two days to tell our favorite puns and one-liners. Both are real laughers. But, there’s a difference between these two hilarious holidays. On National Tell a Joke Day any joke will do. On Tell an Old Joke Day, we pull out our oldest and funniest bits of wit and humor. Most likely, they will cause roars of ...

Jul 20, 2020 ... Are you in need of a laugh? Here are 10 funniest jokes for kids ... joke? Don't forget to like and subscribe for more funny videos! Check out ...Submit your best joke here and get $25 if Reader’s Digest runs it. The post 85 Corny Jokes Everyone Will Laugh at to Celebrate National Tell a Joke Day appeared first on Reader's Digest. No ...boom here is the new official music video for Tell Me A Joke by Quadeca. This is the 2nd and last single for my new album “I Didn’t Mean to Haunt You” DROPPI...Jerry Corley shows you a simple way to tell a joke by using a technique called comedic irony. You can just say it without "saying" it. Get the book Breaking ...Make sure your volume switch is on for this one. Q: Siri, rap for me. A: "Heres's one that's like this and like that and like this." Siri proceeds to rap lyrics. It originally would borrow lyrics from rap artists, but has since branched into offering Siri originals. There are many different answers and raps, so see what you get! Q: Siri, beatbox.Peanut Knock Knock Jokes. Moose Knock Knock Jokes. Chocolate Knock Knock Jokes. Golf Knock Knock Jokes. Funny Bear Knock Knock Jokes. Dragon Knock Knock Jokes. Mother’s Day Knock Knock Jokes. Don’t forget to subscribe to our email list so that you know when we add more great jokes to the site that will leave you laughing …Hilarious Joke #1. A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know.1. Just got attacked by 6 dwarves. Not Happy. 2. A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank. The rabbit says, “I believe that I am a type o.”. 3. You know, there’s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot. 4.Jokes have setups and punchlines. (They also have something comedians call “taglines” or “tags”, but for our purposes, we only need to think about setups and punchlines.) The classic - if hackneyed - setup is, “Why did the chicken cross the road.”. And its classic punchline, with its funniest word placed last, is, “To get to the ...Jul 29, 2022 · Want to hear a funny joke? What did the goldfish say when he swam into a wall? He said, "Dam!" And speaking of which, do you know what many people have in common with goldfish? A short-term memory. There is a widespread belief that goldfish only have a 3-second memory. However, scientists have busted the three-second memory myth.

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The English teacher wished the class good luck before the poetry test. She said, "Metaphors be with you!" And all the students knew that this was the chosen master - who would take them from being simple poetdawans to Jediwritery success one day... “I am friends with 25 letters of the alphabet, I don’t know why.”.

In this video I ask Alexa (the voice of the Amazon Echo) to TELL ME A JOKE! Over and over and over again and OH BOY is she funny!ps - I promise if have video...Here are 105 guaranteed to get a quick laugh: What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus. “I’d like to start with the chimney jokes – I’ve got a stack of...Not knowing the right moment to tell your joke is your biggest mistake. Less is more. The shorter and tighter it is the harder the joke will hit. Unless it’s like that dog one and it needs to be ...As the Edinburgh festival kicks off, James Kettle asks a bunch of this year's comedy stars to tell us their best gag. Compiled by James Kettle. Thu 4 Aug 2011 16.31 EDT. Every summer I meet people ...Have you ever been in a situation where a simple joke had you doubled over in laughter? Laughter is a universal language that brings people together, and jokes are one of its most ...Jokes can come in all shapes and sizes - they can be extremely relatable or completely farfetched! With the oldest joke dating back to 1900 BC, we’ve been cracking jokes for millennia, so much so, we now pay comedians to tell us jokes on a stage. Since the days of the chicken crossing the road, jokes have become wilder and more elaborate.Jokes have been an integral part of human history and many great minds have spent time and energy in trying to understand what makes jokes funny. The day is known in the US as National Tell A Joke Day, and not to be confused with International Joke Day on July, 1.Format Hardcover. ISBN 9780691206165. Timeless advice about how to use humor to win over any audience. Can jokes win a hostile room, a hopeless argument, or even an election? You bet they can, according to Cicero, and he knew what he was talking about. One of Rome’s greatest politicians, speakers, and lawyers, Cicero was also …

1. "Hey Google, Sing Me a Song". You might not think that Google Assistant's talents include taking to the musical stage, but you'd be wrong. Ask Google to sing a song, and it will perform a little ditty: "Yes I can sing. I like to help you, even if it's strange. So I sing." It's not just lyrics, though.National Day Calendar. NATIONAL TELL A JOKE DAY | AUGUST 16. What happened to the comedian on August 16th during National Tell A Joke Day? Everyone stole his punchlines! All joking aside, get out there and laugh a little and tell some funny ones. #TellAJokeDay. This day will be filled with smiles and laughter from morning till night. …This joke may contain profanity. 🤔. I am over 18. My grandma used to tell us this joke. She’d say, “knock knock,” we’d say, “who’s there?”. Then she’d say “I can’t remember!” and start to cry. And we’d laugh and laugh to make her feel better, but she was shit at telling jokes. upvote downvote report.Instagram:https://instagram. number painting Jan 3, 2024 · Make sure your volume switch is on for this one. Q: Siri, rap for me. A: "Heres's one that's like this and like that and like this." Siri proceeds to rap lyrics. It originally would borrow lyrics from rap artists, but has since branched into offering Siri originals. There are many different answers and raps, so see what you get! Q: Siri, beatbox. Hey Google! Tell me a joke 👀 Asking my Google assistant the real questions! Hope you will enjoy this google assistant #short video!How does it work? This is... deactivate account My manhood is only six inches, but it smells like a foot. —–. 29. A man and his family are staying at a hotel. The man asks the employee at the front desk if the adult channels are disabled. No, it’s just regular p*rn, you sick f*ck. —–. 30. Doing the business in elevators is great on so many levels.Some church offering jokes are “Country Church Stewardship” and a joke about Mary’s birthday gift. Another joke tells the story about little Johnny buying candy with his offering m... flights from atlanta to newark Although humor is subjective, one of the funniest jokes according to Stuff You Couldn’t Make Up is: Snake one, “Are we poisonous?” Snake two, “I don’t know, why?” Snake one, “I jus...History of National Tell A Joke Day. The origins of National Tell A Joke Day are unclear. The holiday seemingly emerged in the 1990s or early 2000s as a lighthearted occasion to enjoy humor. While the founder is unknown, the day promotes laughter and comedy. Telling jokes has long been a way for people to bond, entertain, and lift spirits. get growth matrix A hoo-dunit. Why did the owl go to the doctor? Because it had a fever of 102 degrees. What do you call an owl that’s really good at math? A calcu-hoot-er. What do you call an owl that’s an expert gardener? A hoo-ticulturist. What do you call an owl that’s a big fan of jazz music? A hooten-swinger. clcik test When it comes to brightening up someone’s day or breaking the ice in social situations, a funny joke can work wonders. The internet is a treasure trove of jokes waiting to be disco...Hilarious Joke #1. A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. peliculas en linea Pick something very neutral, like an appropriate joke about the weather. Google weather related jokes. Or if you're in the US, look for short jokes/puns about the upcoming time change. Keep it clean, short, and something you wouldn't be embarrassed to tell at a family gathering. They could be trying to sniff out any biases you may have. adblocker stands ADMIN MOD. "A man goes to prison" joke with two opposite punchlines. My grandpa used to tell this joke, one day I heard someone else tell it with almost an exact opposite punchline. I've never tried to type it out before, so sorry if this sucks, but here's how I first heard it: A man goes to prison and the first night while he's laying in bed ...This joke may contain profanity. 🤔. I am over 18. My grandma used to tell us this joke. She’d say, “knock knock,” we’d say, “who’s there?”. Then she’d say “I can’t remember!” and start to cry. And we’d laugh and laugh to make her feel better, but she was shit at telling jokes. upvote downvote report.1) Polite - farts and says "Pardon!" 2) Cynic - Farts while looking you directly in the eyes. 3) Chivalrous - lets the lady fart first. 4) Gourmand - Farts for his own pleasure. 5) Sentimental - Farts and says "Oh..." 6) Idealist - farts out of conviction. sign now login PREV NEXT. Surprisingly, one question some interviewers routinely ask candidates is: “Can you tell me a joke?”. This sort of interview question is nothing to joke about, especially for the perplexed applicant who can’t imagine why an interviewer would want to ask such a thing. Well, here’s why: certain employers use the tell-me-a-joke ...Bobbie: “The skinny one comes out when he is in the toilet. The fat one comes out to brush my nanny’s teeth.”. Life is like a pen*s: women can make it hard in an instant. A worm crawls out of a pile of spaghetti and says: “Damn, that was one hell of a … english to jamaican english translation Be frank about it and just reply as boring as this one. 8. “You paid me every penny I have given to you.”. This isn’t a joke but sarcasm for a friend who borrowed money from you. But it’s a joke to you, because you know they are still not going to pay back. So, you just have to laugh it out.Tell us about how you benefit from spending time outdoors and what that time looks like for you, and your writing may be featured here or elsewhere on Reader’s Digest. Put your pen to paper ... you tube short Netflix. Comedian Andrew Schulz revealed on the “Flagrant” interview series that he was instructed not to make jokes at Netflix ‘s Tom Brady roast related to Robert …Jan 8, 2024 · Be frank about it and just reply as boring as this one. 8. “You paid me every penny I have given to you.”. This isn’t a joke but sarcasm for a friend who borrowed money from you. But it’s a joke to you, because you know they are still not going to pay back. So, you just have to laugh it out. gooding and co 8. ”I said to the Gym instructor “Can you teach me to do the splits?”. He said, ”How flexible are you?”. I said, ”I can’t make Tuesdays”. - seen on the internet (a Tommy Cooper gag) 9. Two aerials meet on a roof – fall in love – get married. The ceremony was rubbish – but the reception was brilliant. The bus driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!”. The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!”. The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”. I said to the Gym instructor “Can you teach ... It’s sometimes hard for me to tell what’s real and what’s not.”. I went for an interview for a job today and the manager said, “We’re looking for someone who’s responsible.” “Well, I’m your man!!”. I replied, “In my …